The National Council of Negro Women held its annual panel “Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow?” on Tuesday, Feb. 9 in the Alfonso Elder Student Union. Panel participants addressed common questions of love, relationships and sex. The NCNW’s mission is to lead, develop and advocate for women of African descent.
Mister NCNW Christopher McKoy and Miss NCNW Ashia Williamson hosted the panel. Panelists included Miss NCCU Kourtney Daniel-Robinson, Senior Class President Keyona Presha, Mister Kappa Alpha Psi Kendall Davenport, Mister University Honors Program Josh Strayhorn, along with students Deron Perkins and Tia Newman.
NCNW president Olivia Hall said she included upperclassmen in the panel to give younger students — mostly freshmen and sophomores — insight into older students’ points of view about love, sex and relationships.
“That’s why we like it to be very informal and open,” she said. “You get real personal information that you probably can’t ask just anybody.”
A variety of topics surfaced during the panel discussion: “Why do men and women cheat?” “Who cheats more?” “Is flirting cheating?” “What’s the difference between titles like ‘talking’ ‘dating’ ‘exclusive’?” and “What does loyalty really mean?”
Some students said that people cheat because they’re just not ready for a commitment, some said it’s because something’s wrong in the relationship, but others said it happens just because people get “horny” and are “no good.”
The topic of cheating alone seemed to stir up controversy as students waved their hands eager to voice their opinions.
When the question “Which is worse, physical or emotional cheating?” was posed the majority of ladies felt emotional cheating was worse, but a lot of males expressed that physical was a deal-breaker.
“Honestly, I can’t even bear the thought that my girl was somewhere on her knees for another dude or riding him!” panelist Deron Perkins historical education junior said.
“Another thing with females though is that when they cheat physically it usually is emotionally! Y’all can’t just screw the dude, y’all have to like him too!” said panelist Kendall Davenport, a business marketing senior.
“See emotional cheating is so bad because it’s true that a lot of times guys can just mess with a girl and be done. But if you’re sitting up on the phone with her, spending time with her, then you end up catching feelings for the girl it just hurts more,” panelist Keyosha Presha senior in business administration said. “Regardless cheating is cheating.”
Some of the nuances of relationship titles were then explored.
“Having a “title” with someone when you aren’t in a relationship shouldn’t matter because the purpose of dating someone is to get to know them to see if you want to commit to them,” panelist Tia Newman senior in business administration said.
“Don’t let people tell you that you need a title with someone to be happy with them. Focus on you two and what you want,” said sophomore history major Josh Strayhorn.
“Why do ladies never want to tell us what’s wrong when we ask?” wondered Deron Perkins. One male student said “It’s my job to know her. A female student agreed with a laugh: “As my boyfriend he should just know!”
But what if your significant other brings around a “play brother” or “play sister”? Audience members agreed that something is off with this type of title.
“You should know your significant other’s family and close friends. If you even have to question if your partner would mind you hanging with the person don’t do it,” said business administration senior Newman.
“It is possible to have close friends of the opposite sex,” said panelist Kendall Davenport, a business marketing senior. “Just stay away from influences like liquor, that’s what gets people in trouble!”
Miss NCCU Kourtney Daniel-Robinson closed the panel with some words of advice. “Figure out what you want before getting into a relationship. Don’t rush things. Take your time. Your happiness is what matters. And don’t compromise what you want for anyone else.”